Flavors of entanglement

 

1- Citizen of The Planet

2- Underneath

3- Straitjacket

4- Versions of Violence

5- Not As We

6- In Praise of The Vulnerable Man

7- Moratorium

8- Torch

9- Giggling Again For No Reason

10- Tapes

11- Incomplete

 

Bonus (version japonaise + B-side du single Underneath)

12- 20-20

13- It's a bitch to grow up

 

2ème disque (édition deluxe)

1- Orchid

2- The Guy Who Leaves

3- Madness

4- Limbo No More

5- On The Tequila

 

1- Citizen of the planet

 

I start up in the north I grow from a special seed

I sprinkle it with sensibility

From French and Hungarian snow

I linger in the sprouting until my engine's full

 

Then I move across the sea

To European bliss

To language of poets

As I cut the cord of home

I kiss my mother's mother

Look to the horizon

 

Wide eyed, new ground

Humbled by my new surroundings

 

I am a citizen of the planet

My president is Kwan Yin

My frontier is on an airplane

My prisons: homes for rehabilitating

 

Then I fly back to my rest I fly back with my nuclear but

everything is different

 

So I wait, my yearn for home is broadened, patriotism expanded by

callings from beyond

 

So I pack my things nothing precious all things sacred

 

I am a citizen of the planet

My laws are all of attraction

My punishments are consequences

Separating from source the original sin

 

I am a citizen of the planet

Democracy's kids are sovereign

Where the teachers are the sages

And pedestals filled with every parent

 

And so the next few years are blurry, the next decade's a flurry

of smells and tastes unknown

Threads sewn straight through this fabric

Through fields of every color

One culture to another

 

I come alive and I get giddy

I am taken and globally naturalized

 

I am a citizen of the planet

From simple roots through high vision

I am guarded by the angels

And my body guides the direction I go in

 

I am a citizen of the planet

My favorite pastime edge stretching

Besotten with human condition

These ideals are borne from my deepest within

 

2- Underneath

Look at us break our bonds in this kitchen

Look at us rallying all our defenses

Look at us waging war in our bedroom

Look at us jumping ship in our dialogues

 

There is no difference in what we're doing in here

That doesn't show up as bigger symptoms out there

So why spend all our time in dressing our bandages

When we've the ultimate key to the cause right here, our underneath

 

Look at us our form our cliques in our sandbox

Look at us micro kids with both our hearts blocked

Look at us turn away from all the rough spots

Look at dictatorship on my own block

 

There is no difference in what we're doing in here

That doesn't show up as bigger symptoms out there

So why spend all our time in dressing our bandages

When we've the ultimate key to the cause right here, our underneath

 

How I've spun my wheels with carts before my horse

When shine on the outside springs from the root

Spotlight on these seeds of simpler reasons

This core, born into form, starts in our livingroom

 

There is no difference in what we're doing in here

That doesn't show up as bigger symptoms out there

So why spend all our time in dressing our bandages

When we've the ultimate key to the cause right here, our underneath

 

3- Straitjacket

Something so benign for construed as cruelty

Such a difference between who I am and who you see

 

Conclusions you come to of me routinely incorrect

I don’t know who you’re talking to with such fucking disrespect

 

This shit’s making me crazy

The way you nullify what’s in my head

You say one thing do another

And argue that’s not what you did

Your way’s making me mental

How you filter as skewed interpret

I swear you won’t be happy til

I am bound in a straitjacket

 

Talking with you’s like talking to a sieve that can’t hear me

You fight me tooth and nail to disavow what’s happening

 

Your resistance to a mirror I feel screaming from your body

One day I’ll introduce myself and you’ll see you’ve not yet met me

 

This shit’s making me crazy

The way you nullify what’s in my head

You say one thing do another

And argue that’s not what you did

Your way’s making me mental

How you filter as skewed interpret

I swear you won’t be happy til

I am bound in a straitjacket

 

Grand dissonance

The strings of my puppet are cut

The end of an era

Your discrediting’s lost my consent

 

This shit’s making me crazy

The way you nullify what’s in my head

You say one thing do another

And argue that’s not what you did

Your way’s making me mental

How you filter as skewed interpret

I swear you won’t be happy til

I am bound in a straitjacket

 

4- Versions of Violence

 Coercing or leaving

Shutting down and punishing

Running from rooms, defending

Withholding, justifying

 

These versions of violence

Sometimes subtle sometimes clear

And the ones that go unnoticed

Still leave their mark once disappeared

 

Diagnosing, analyzing

Unsolicited advice

Explaning and controlling,

Judging opining and meddling

 

These versions of violence

Sometimes subtle sometimes clear

And the ones that go unnoticed

Still leave their mark once disappeared

 

This labeling

This pointing

This sensitive’s unraveling

This Sting I’ve been ignoring

I feel it way down way down

 

These versions of violence

Sometimes subtle sometimes clear

And the ones that go unnoticed

Still leave their Mark once disappeared

 

5- Not As We

Reborn and shivering

Spat out on new terrain

Unsure unconvincing

This faint and shaky hour

 

Day one, day one

Start over again

Step one, step one

I'm barely making sense

For now I'm faking it

'Til I'm psuedo-making it

From scratch, begin again

But this time I as I

And not as we

 

Gun shy and giuvering

Timid without a hand

Feign brave but still intent

Little and hardly here

 

Day one, day one

Start over again

Step one, step one

I'm barely making sense

For now I'm faking it

'Til I'm psuedo-making it

From scratch, begin again

But this time I as I

And not as we

 

Eyes wet toward wide open frayed,

If God's taking bets, I pray he wants to lose,

 

Day one, day one

Start over again

Step one, step one

I'm barely making sense

For now I'm faking it

'Til I'm psuedo-making it

From scratch, begin again

But this time I as I

And not as we

 

6- In Praise of The Vulnerable Man

You are the bravest man I’ve ever met

You unreluctant at treacherous ledge

 

You are the sexiest man I’ve ever been with

You, never hotter than with armor spent

 

When you do what you do to provide

How you land in the soft as you fortify

 

This is in praise of the vulnerable man

Why won’t you lead the rest of your cavalry home

 

You, with your eyes mix strength with abandon

You with your new kind of heroism

 

And I bow and I bow down to you

To the grace that it takes to melt on through

 

This is in praise of the vulnerable man

Why won’t you lead the rest of your cavalry home

This is a thank you for letting me in

Indeed in praise of the vulnerable man

 

You are the greatest man I’ve ever met

You the stealth setter of new precedents

 

And I vow and I vow to be true

And I vow and I vow to not take advantage

 

This is in praise of the vulnerable man

Why won’t you lead the rest of your cavalry home

This is a thank you for letting me in

Indeed in praise of the vulnerable man

 

7- Moratorium

I’ve never been this accountable-less and within

I’ve never known focuslessness on any form

 

I’ve never had this lack of ache for dalliance

To let go and let God in ways I have never even imagined

 

I declare a moratorium on things relationship

I declare a respite from the toils of liaison

I do need a breather from the flavors of entanglement

I declare a full time out from all things commitment

 

I’ve never let my grasp soften fingers like this

I’ve never been careless otherless like autonomy’s twin

 

I declare a moratorium on things relationship

I declare a respite from the toils of liaison

I do need a breather from the flavors of entanglement

I declare a full time out from all things commitment

 

Ah to breathe

Stop looking outside

Stop searching in corners of rooms

Not my business or timing

Ahhh

 

I’ve never known freedom from intertwining

I start again this time for keeps in my skin I’m residing

 

I declare a moratorium on things relationship

I declare a respite from the toils of liaison

I do need a breather from the flavors of entanglement

I declare a full time out from all things commitment

 

8- Torch

I miss your smell and your style and your pure abiding way

Miss your approach to life and your body in my bed

Miss your take on anything and the music you would play

Miss cracking up and wrestling and our debriefs at end of day

 

These are things that I miss

These are not times for the weak of heart

These are the days of raw despondence

I never dreamed I would have to lay down my torch for you like this

 

I miss your neck and your gait and your sharing what you write

Miss you walking through the front door documentaries in your hand

Miss traveling our traveling and your fun and charming friends

Miss our big sur getaways

And to watch you love my dogs

 

These are things that I miss

These are not times for the weak of heart

These are the days of raw despondence

I never dreamed I would have to lay down my torch for you like this

 

One step one prayer I soldier on, simulating moving on

 

I miss your warmth and the thought of us bringing up our kids

And the part of you that walks with your stick-tied handkerchief

 

These are things that I miss

These are not times for the weak of heart

These are the days of raw despondence

I never dreamed I would have to lay down my torch for you like this

 

These are things that I miss

These are not times for the weak of heart

These are the days of raw despondence

I never dreamed I would have to lay down my torch for you like this

 

9- Giggling Again For No Reason

Giggling Again For No Reason

 

I am driving in my car up highway one

I left LA without telling anyone

There were people who needed something from me

But I am sure they’ll get along fine on their own

 

Oh this state of ecstasy

Nothing but road could ever give to me

This liberty wind in my face

And I’m giggling again for no reason

 

I am dancing with my friends in elation

We’ve taken adventures to new levels of fun

I can feel the bones are smiling in my body

I can see the meltings of inhibition

 

Oh this state of ecstasy

Nothing but road could ever give to me

This liberty wind in my face

And I’m giggling again for no reason

 

I’m reeling jubilation

Triumphant in delight

I am at home in this high five

And I’m smiling for no reason

 

I am sitting at the set of cali sun

We’ve gotten quiet for its’ last precious seconds

I can feel the salt of the sea on my skin

And we still hear the echoes of abandon(ing)

 

Oh this state of ecstasy

 

10- Tapes

"I am someone easy to leave"

"Even easier to forget”

A voice, if inaccurate

 

Again: “I’m the one they all run from”

Diatribes of clouded sun

Someone help me find the pause button

 

All these tapes in my head swirl around

Kepping my vibe down

All these thoughts in my head aren’t my own

Wreaking havoc

 

“I’m too exhausting to be loved”

“a volatile chemical”

“Best to quarantine and cut off”

 

All these tapes in my head swirl around

Kepping my vibe down

All these thoughts in my head aren’t my own

Wreaking havoc

 

“I’m but thorn in your sweet side”

“You are better off without me”

“It’d be best to leave at once”

 

All these tapes in my head swirl around

Kepping my vibe down

All these thoughts in my head aren’t my own

Wreaking havoc

 

11- Incomplete

One day I'll find relief

I'll be arrived and I'll be a friend to my friends who know how to be friends

 

One day I'll be at peace

I’ll be enlightened and I'll be married with children and maybe adopt

 

One day I will be healed

I will gather my wounds forge the end of tragic comedy

 

I have been running so sweaty my whole life

Urgent for a finish line

And I have been missing the rapture this whole time

Of being forever incomplete

 

One day, my mind will retreat, and I'll know god and I'll be constantly one with her night dusk and day

One day I'll be secure, like the women I see on their 30th anniversaries

 

I have been running so sweaty my whole life

Urgent for a finish line

And I have been missing the rapture this whole time

Of being forever incomplete

 

Ever unfolding

Ever expanding

Ever adventurous and torturous

But never done

 

One day, I will speak freely

I'll be less afraid

And measured outside of my poems and lyrics and art

One day I will be faith-filled

I'll be trusting and spacious authentic and grounded and whole

 

I have been running so sweaty my whole life

Urgent for a finish line

And I have been missing the rapture this whole time

Of being forever incomplete

 

12- 20/20

I would never have been in such a rush

I would never have tried to control

I would never have worn such 'fear lenses'

I would never have held on so tightly

 

I would have kept my boundaries set

My loving no's, my unwavering yes's

Risked abandonment and stood by that

And thereby felt constant connect

 

This fountain of regret, this looking back with twenty-twenty

Torturous hindsight if I knew then what I know now

This mountain of remorse won't repeat with my understanding

This wouldn't have happened if I knew then what I know now

 

I would've gone slower

Pushed infrequent

Would not have rushed into such commitment

I would've shown restraint as my feet got wet

I would've baby-stepped into intimate

 

This fountain of regret, this looking back with twenty-twenty

This torturous hindsight if I knew then what I know now

This mountain of remorse won't repeat with my understanding

This wouldn't have happened if I knew then what I know now

 

I would've known much more

Known that time was all we had for future depth to unfold

I would've had more faith at every step

I would've kept intact through the whole process

 

Oh this fountain of regret is looking back with twenty-twenty

Torturous hindsight if I knew then what I know now

This mountain of remorse won't repeat with my understanding

This wouldn't have happened if I knew then what I know

 

13- It's a bitch to grow up

It's been 10 years of investment

It's been one foot in and one out

It's been 4 days of full of shit

and I feel snuffed out

 

It's been 33 years of restraining

Of trying to control this tumult

How I did invest in such fantasy

But my nervous system has worn out

 

I feel done, I feel raked over coals

and all that remains is the case

That it's a bitch to grow up

 

I've repeated this dance ad-nauseum

There's still something to learn that I've not

I'm told to see this as divine perfection

But my bones don't feel this perfection

 

I feel done, I feel raked over coals

and all that remains is the case

That it's a bitch to grow up

 

I've spent life hovering above bottom

Thinking I can't survive what's below

But I've known through the kicking and screaming

That there was no other direction to go

 

I feel done, I feel raked over coals

and all that remains is the case

That it's a bitch to grow up

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1- Orchid

Me, and my helmet such an un-conventional kid

All intense and kinetic, at best tolerated from afar

Not yet arrested, and by that I mean betrothed

though a start I am newly courted

I've just not been trusted with alters

 

I'm a sweet piece of work, well intentioned yet disturbed

wrongly label-ed and under-fed, treated like a rose as an orchid

 

My friends, as they weigh in, get understandably protective

They have a hard time being objective

So inside we cancel each other out

 

I'm a sweet piece of work, well intentioned and unloved

unlabeled and misunderstood, treated like a rose as an orchid

 

You've brought water to me, making sure my bloom rebounds

you know best of what my special care allows

 

So I've lived in my blind spot

thought myself usual when I'm not

and your garden is a nice spot

as long as it is brave and where you are

 

For this sweet piece of work, high maintenance and deserted

I've been different and deserving, treated like a rose as an orchid

Sweet piece of work, overwhelmed un-observed

I've been bowed down to but so misread

treated like a rose as an orchid

 

2- The guy who leaves

Get up

Don't get up

I beg you to sit tight

 

Sweet girl

I'll be a ghost girl

Forget it, I am fine

 

If anything

A witnessing

Is all I needed that night

 

Until I get what I'm to get

He'll keep being compelled to flee

Until I out his false story

I'll keep playing the guy who leaves

 

Brother,

Oh, brother

Solo you did bust out

 

All I knew was

You didn't invite me

So begins the self-doubt

 

There is nothing

As harrowing

As how I translate facts

 

Until I get what I'm to get

He'll keep being compelled to flee

Until I out his false story

I'll keep playing the guy who leaves

 

Baby

Oh, partner

How well you've played this part

 

Similar

Oh, how familiar

Reluctant truth you impart

 

And how you served

Necesity

Repeat until she sees light

 

Until I get what I'm to get

He'll keep being compelled to flee

Until I out his false story

I'll keep playing the guy who leaves

 

3- Madness

I've been most unwilling

To see this turmoil of mine

The thought of sitting with this

Has me paralyzed

 

With this prolonged exposure

To near and averted eyes

I think that I've been waiting

Such mileage for empathizing

 

Now I see the madness in me

Is brought out in the presence of you

Now I know the madness lives on

When you're not in the room

Though I'd love to blame you for all

I'd miss these moments of opportune

You simply brought this madness to light

And I should thank you

 

Oh, thank you

Much thanks for this bird's eye view

Oh, thank you

For your most generous triggers

 

It's been all too easy

To cross my arms and roll my eyes

The thought of dropping all arms

Leaves me terrified

 

And now I see the madness in me

Is brought out in the presence of you

Now I know the madness lives on

When you're not in the room

Though I'd love to blame you for all

I'd miss these moments of opportune

You simply brought this madness to light

And I should thank you

 

Oh, thank you

Much thanks for this bird's eye view

Oh, thank you

For your most generous triggers

 

I'd have to give up knowing

And give up being right

You, inadvertent hero

You, angel in disguise

 

And now I see the madness in me

Is brought out in the presence of you

And now I know the madness lives on

When you're not in the room

And though I'd love to blame you for all

I'd miss these moments of opportune

You simply brought this madness to light

And I should thank you

 

Oh, thank you

Much thanks for this bird's eye view

Oh, thank you

For your most generous triggers

 

4- Limbo no more

My house, my role

My friends, my man

My devotion to God

All amorphous, indefinit

 

Nothing's been clear

Nothing's been in

Nothing's felt true

And I've never had both feet in

Nothing's belonged

Nothing's been 'yes'

Nowhere's been home

And I'm ready to be limbo no more

 

My taste, my peers

My identity

My affiliation

All amorphous, indefinit

 

Nothing's been clear

Nothing's been in

Nothing's felt true

And I've never had both feet in

Nothing's belonged

Nothing's been 'yes'

Nowhere's been home

And I'm ready to be limbo no more

 

I sit with filled frames

And my books and my dogs at my feet

My friends by my side

My past in a heap

Thrown out most of my things

Only kept what I need to carve

Something consistent

And notably me

 

Tattoo on my skin

My teacher's in heart

My house is a home

Something at last I can feel a part of

A sense of myself

My purpose is clear

My roots in the ground

Something at last I can feel a part of

 

Something aligned

To finally commit

Somewhere I belong

'Cause I'm ready to be limbo no more

My wisdom applied

A firm foundation

A vow to myself

'Cause I'm ready to be limbo no more

 

5- On the tequila

Bring on the Tequila oh

On fire on Tequila oh

 

My friends and I meet hours before

We make some home made pizza

We do some funny bits back and forth

My knees buckle I laugh so hard

 

We might end three sheets to wind

And who knows where we'll wind up

All I know is there’s a car waiting

And we’ll figure that out after

 

I have to keep my eye on my old friend from high school

We’ve known each other for the longest time

She has trouble with her dance so to speak

She can hoist a really good kick in the butt when she's excited

She doesn’t do it so much anymore

'Cuz we’re all on to her

 

Bring on the Tequila oh

On fire on Tequila oh

Mostest most on Tequila oh

Bestest friends on Tequila oh

 

Then there’s my other pretty friend from high school

The predator in me is put to shame by the predator in her

and now i've reeled it in

It’ll be interesting to see how much she’s done as well

 

Then there’s my friend from Chigago

God do I love all people from Chicago

All ready to light up the barbeque

And be harping on debauchery

 

Bring on the Tequila oh

On fire on Tequila oh

Mostest most on Tequila oh

Bestest friends on Tequila oh

 

Then there’s my Canadian friend

What a fabulous mom she’s become

She’s been tortured in this sense

for the last many of months for obvious reasons

 

She was like "hey where was this part of you when I wasn’t pregnant"

I laughed and did a shot in her honor

As I conversed with her belly

 

Bring on the Tequila oh

On fire on Tequila oh

Mostest most on Tequila oh

Bestest friends on Tequila oh

 

Then there’s my Cupid friend

She sure knows how to dress that one

She’s a wise and worldly girl

But you gotta watch that medication

 

My favorite beverage is taken to a whole other level on it

I’m not worried about it or I’ll coast around the room

While I trust she’ll temper

 

My brother came to visit me

And now he’s used to hanging with me and cracking up

But he had no idea about my built up tolerance

No idea about how manipulative I’ve become

I would seruptitiously put it in front of him without him asking

In a pretty little shot glass

His smirk and cackle would only agg me on

 

Bring on the Tequila oh

On fire on Tequila oh

Mostest most on Tequila oh

Bestest friends on Tequila oh